Listen up boys and girls, it’s time for your favorite part of the week! Noo it’s not the album release anymore, nor is it the excitement of buying tour tickets… it’s tabloid ******** time! YAY!

This week, either Britney is too thin or going through a tough time again. One of them I agree with. Eat a sandwhich! OK, not that one.

OK!: It’s starting again. Britney in crisis! Tearful meltdowns, shaky performances, desperate for her kids… the inside story of how she’s been pushed too far, too fast.
WTF? They haven’t kissed her *** in two weeks! Is there trouble with the fam and OK!? Juicy!

Star: Brit’s deadly diet! She drops 25 lbs with dangerous pills, bingeing & purging.
*******, you named her one of the hottest beach bodies just 2 months ago. Your editor is probably fat. Which is ok. Embrace it. Didn’t you know I’m into that?

Life & Style: How they got thin fast. 10 lbs in 2 weeks! The new all-natural shake that speeds metabolism.
So one mag says she barfs up her dinner, the other claims it’s a shake! Consistency at its finest!

Us Weekly: Too much too soon?
You can say that again. And what the hell – why is Heidi Montag the HBIC on this cover. It’s Britney or nothing. I guess they went with the nothing…

We all saw the new People magazine…

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