Why is In Touch such a ****** downer every week? Seriously, just make a friggin “Who’s Hot & Who’s Not” issue for once in your life – stop being so damn dramatic! Anyway, this week’s headline says “New book’s sad claim: Britney’s life was worse than anyone knew.” I guess they’re talking about Lynne’s new memoir, or at least I hope they are. Kind of. I can’t handle anyone else putting a book out about her; I’d be bummed. Unless it’s London writing a book, no one wants to read it! Guess we’ll have to wait and see…

Moving on to a more positive cover, check out Life & Style this week (I never thought I’d say “positive” and “Life & Style” in the same sentence). As summer nears an end (seriously… I have classes in like 2 hours. UGH), L&S names the best and worst summer moments including Britney’s new **** bikini body (I just wanted to use parenthesis again). Congrats Brit!

No covers for People, Us Weekly, Star or OK! this week.

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