GQ Magazine – Kevin Federline – November 19

November 18, 2005 By Jordan Miller

breatheheavy GQ: Meet the American Husband: Trophy Edition. This year Kevin Federline, better known as Mr. Britney Spears, set a new standard in lifestyle achievement. With his perma-scruff and his signature tank-top chic, K-Fed cemented his role as America’s premier slacker spouse/*** symbol. And he’s certainly enjoying the ride, proving that he can not only hold his own but also capitalize on it, spawning an oddly charming reality series, Britney & Kevin: Chaotic, and an upcoming album. But we can’t let K-Fed waltz off with Man of the Year honors without testing his mettle. So what kind of husband is he? You decide. Knows his way around Home Depot? “Oh yeah. Home Depot is the ****. If I have time, I’ll do stuff around the house.”

Does the dishes? “We got help, so..”

Understands why he’s a GQ Man of the Year? “Because I’m Daddy, dude. I’m Daddy. ****, that’s pretty much it.”

Picks up after himself? “Sometimes. You know how it is. Guys don’t really pick up after themselves.”

Picks up after the dog? “Uh… Oh man. If I see it first… But Bit Bit is
good now. If she was big enough, she’d probably jump up on the toilet and take a **** in there.”

Excels at some household task? “Pressing the TV buttons. Yeah, dude. That’s like the number one thing.”

Sits through *** and the City without complaint? “She’ll watch the reruns even after she’s seen the damn thing a hundred times. And I can’t watch that. I’ll sit there with her, but I ain’t paying attention.”
Relinquishes control of the car stereo? “That’d be one of them where the fights come in from time to time. I can’t listen to Hilary Duff and Kelly Clarkson all the time.”

Performs thoughtful gestures, such as buying flowers? “Oh yeah. I’ll call up the ****ing florist before I get a hotel room for us and have them stock it with flowers and a card saying something. You’ve got to keep it interesting, man.”

Takes an active role in home improvement? “I designed our backyard. We’ve got a pool, a grotto, a barbecue area. But the key piece is the shark tank. It’s probably like 600 gallons. A flat-screen TV comes up in front of it. It’s like a tropical paradise back here, man!”

Willing to hold his wife’s purse? “Oh yeah, I’ll hold her purse. It’s one of those things, you know? I’ve bought the Tampax, the baby diapers, I’ve been through all of that already.”

Always closes the bathroom door? Not always. “The comfort level around here? It’s family, man. It’s like what you do with your brother or your sister or, you know, your moms or pops. I mean, you never cared when you were a kid.” Thanks!