Rolling Stone Magazine Slams Britney

December 22 2004, 10:45 pm

Rolling Stone this weeks features interviews with stars such as Paris Hilton, Gwen Stefani, U2, and Lindsay Lohan to name a handful. As I was reading these, I seemed to notice Britney's name on many of the pages.

Then there is an article talking about Britney's quickie marriage to Jason
Alexander:

The
Bride Wore Black

Hey little sister! What have you done? Britney Spears kicked off 2004 with a bang, getting hitched in an all-night Las Vegas chapel in the early hours of January 3rd. Spears married childhood pal Jason Alexander, after a courtship of one totally awesome weekend! And they were so not wasted! The couple justified their love around 4 a.m. at the Little White Wedding Chapel, where the bride reportedly handed a Jack Daniel's bottle to a homeless person on the way out. "We had a spiritual connection," Alexander said. But it was too good to last. Spears' party-pooping lawyers got the marriage annulled after a new world-record fifty-five hours. (Take that, Cher!) Alexander opened up to the U.K. tabloids, revealing that Spears didn't wear any panties to the ceremony. Said the abandoned groom, "She was a natural with the most fantastic ass I've ever felt."

In a Lindsay Lohan article:

"...Fans loved her realness, though Lohan should beware of growing up too fast. As a certain other Disney star can surely attest, the road from barely legal to tragically, unmistakable legal is a raught one: A single wrong move and a girl can from America's sweetheart to whiping Cheeto dust from the goatee of Husband Number Two while a lone paparazzi dozes in the bushes. Stay off the Red Bull, Lindsay!"

During the first Paris Hilton article it says:
Narrator: "That's why Paris sums up American culture in 2004, the year when Britney's gold dust turned to Cheetos."

Then later on in the second Paris Hilton article it says:

Interviewer: So no boob job? And no tattoos?
Paris: They look cool on some people, but I don't want any. Plus, I'd get sick of them.
Interviewer: So you're the only girl in America without a tattoo above her ass?

Ah Do! Britney Hitched
"What, was the wedding chapel at Dollywood all booked up? Short of that, knot-tyin's don't get much more white-trash than the Britney Spears-Kevin Federline union, her second marriage of the year. A cash bar?! We know the pink ladies add up, but In The Zone didn't tank that badly, did it? And can you really "register" at 7-Eleven? No joke: The doomed couple's first dance was to Journey's "Lights," rather than the clearly superior "Open Arms."

My *note*
It's really sad that Rolling Stone has to use Britney's name in every article to attract more readers. I could have sworn that Britney's topless shoot was the most sold issue of Rolling Stone ever published...hmm, OR wait, correct me if I'm wrong, but...I think that there was something like... a SPECIAL EDITION ISSUE of Britney Spears alone! Seems to me this magazine is just turnging into another tabloid...If you use this, please credit my site, as it took over an hour to find all these articles, scan the pictures, type the articles, and post in an easy-to-read fashion.