Formally declare Beyoncé's birthday, September 4th, a national holiday.
9... 4... 8... 1... BDAY. Today turns 34-years-old today, and so all people outside the Beyhive are aware of the momentous occasion, her fans have created a petition on Whitehouse.gov to make every September 4 here on out a national holiday. If any petition reaches 100,000 signatures, The White House addresses it.
"In recognition of Beyoncé Knowles' (also known as Sasha Fierce) numerous positive contributions to the betterment of both the musical landscape and society as a whole, we hereby petition the Obama Administration to officially declare September 4th 'B'Day.'"
In honor of "B'Day," the American people are invited to celebrate by:
1. Acknowledging who run the world. (Girls.)
2. Reminding those around them that they woke up like this.
3. Informing past romantic partners that if they liked it, they should have put a ring on it.
4. Flexing while their hands are up.
5. Feeling themselves.
At the time of posting, there were 699 signatures (99,301 needed by Oct. 3) and the hashtag #BeyDay was trending world-wide on Twitter. We know it's silly, but they have a signature from us.