Katy's currently on the road performing her Prismatic tour. "Every show day, from the moment I wake up, it's just prep for that night," she says. "It's like I'm a Kobe beef cow."
After coming under fire for alleged cultural insensitivity (largely for having big-bootied mummies dance in her tour and dressing up as a geisha at the American Music Awards), Perry offers a passionate defense of her intentions.
"As far as the mummy thing, I based it on plastic surgery," she says. "Look at someone like Kim Kardashian or Ice-T's wife, Coco. Those girls aren't African-American. But it's actually a representation of our culture wanting to be plastic, and that's why there's bandages and it's mummies. I thought that would really correlate well together… It came from an honest place. If there was any inkling of anything bad, then it wouldn't be there, because I'm very sensitive to people."
She knows the rules are changing, that "cultural appropriation" is increasingly uncool, but she's not thrilled about it. "I guess I'll just stick to baseball and hot dogs, and that's it," she says. "I know that's a quote that's gonna come to fuck me in the ass, but can't you appreciate a culture? I guess, like, everybody has to stay in their lane? I don't know."
Perry would like to have a baby someday – and she doesn't "need a dude" for that.
"I want to be doing that in the right time," she says. "And that's not in the next two years, you know? Maybe it's in a five-year plan, but I need to really be able to focus 100 percent of my attention on it. I don't really want to take the child on tour. Not until, like, birth through five is over." And there doesn't necessarily have to be a man in the picture, she adds, mentioning her friends Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka. "I don't need a dude. I mean, Neil and David, their twins are beautiful. It's 2014! We are living in the future; we don't need anything. I don't think I'll have to, but we'll see. I'm not anti-men. I love men. But there is an option if someone doesn't present himself."
Perry was teased in school.
"I'm the class clown's assistant," she says. "That's what I was in high school. I mean, they called me 'over-the-shoulder boulder holder,' and I wasn't that cute. I looked like a square – a rectangle, actually – because I was going through my teenage awkward phase."
On the benefits of therapy.
"That's a safe place for me to actually work out everything that's going on inside by a person who knows me as Katheryn Hudson. Not as Katy Perry. I would say anyone that's in this business should be doing that regularly -- to have that kind of accountability, because you get to a place where, like, no one holds you accountable. You can do anything you want, and it's so destructive."
On her new friend Madonna.
"You have to really prove that you're an authentic person, and you can be trusted, to be in a circle of friends with her. Which I totally understand. You have to really guard your heart when you're on this kind of level. You can't just have weirdos around you, strange people that want to suck your blood. Because everybody wants to be on your dick, you know? So you have to be very very 'What are your motives? Why are you here? What do you want from me?'"
On her divorce from ex-husband Russell Brand.
"It was emotionally traumatic for me. It was the death of a dream. I was in fairy-tale land, and the reality of it wasn't so. But I don't really like talking about it anymore, because it feels like a thousand lifetimes ago, and also it makes me look desperate, like I need it for attention."
On what she's looking for in a man.
"I'm interested in colorful personalities. Look, I can't be perfect. I don't know. I think you love who you love. You learn over time. I mean, each one has been different. I tweeted the other day that I'm just looking for the prince that fits my glass Jordans slipper."
Full issue out on Friday.