Britney Wants A Breast Reduction?

If you thought I wasn't going to use a ridiculously outrageous picture of Britney's breasts for a ridiculously outrageous article about them, you're sadly mistaken. Besides, we all need our daily dose of bullshit gossip to get us through the day.

MSN UK is reporting that Britney wants a breast reduction so she can fit into her clothes better. Weird, I think her boobs fit great into clothes (this post is becoming much more sexist and chauvinistic by the moment)!

"Britney is apparently considering a breast reduction, saying she struggles to fit into slinky clothes."


"I have a love-hate relationship with my boobs," she said. "At the moment I hate them. I want them smaller."

She added: "I can't wear the kind of suits that used to love, the red PVC one I got to wear for the Oops I Did It Again video, for example, and I don't feel streamlined.

"I'm tempted to have a breast reduction so I can slink into some amazing stage outfits for my next set of shows. I know they look sexy but sometimes they get in the way."

Yes, I'm sure Britney opened up about her boobs to some tabloid. In fact, I know she did because I was there and all she wanted to talk to me about was her boobs! Promise! Alright, that's a lie (clarifying so I'm not sued).

Who comes up with this shit? Are they paid by the letter, or just how many times they can throw the words "Britney" & "boob" in the same sentence?

Keep them like they are, Brit! Promise!